My partner.

I have been dating Tom for two years now, and we got engaged in February in one of the geekiest and most romantic ways ever

After I had my week of “freaking out” over having gotten engaged, I realized something… I realized that nothing changed that day.

Why hasn’t anything changed? Because we have a healthy relationship, a continuous one, the kind that does not change overnight.

So it‘s true, my relationship with Tom did not change on February 13th, 2009. It changed on many unmemorable days that lead up to February 13th, which we chose to mark as a landmark for romantic reasons. This relationship kept changing after February 13th, and still is.

To explain the title: I normally refer to Tom as my partner, rather than my boyfriend or fiancé.
Some may find this reference unromantic. However, he and I both believe, that it is the most accurate, and most romantic, term to describe our relationship. We are partners, we have chosen each other, to share everything, and to continuously be together, as best friends, companions, and romantic partners.

So when I refer to Tom as my partner, it is not to lessen the romanticism of our fiancaille, but to emphasize the continuity of our friendship, our commitment to always be together, and to always be there for each other.
So this is why I avoid using the provisional terms of reference. Partner is a definite description that changelessly describes Tom for me.

…It is not that our relationship doesn’t change, it is only that it doesn’t change on those days that we decide to celebrate it…

I think I’ll actually call him husband when we get married though, since that is not a provisional term

This entry was posted on 3. May 2009 at 10:31 and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response or trackback from your own site.